The History of John Cena

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  • Published: 22 January 2019
  • JOANA SWEATER NOW AVAILABLE: hellojuniper.com/channel/UCkin59aR57-RgqvN04jHSIg/p/1865852518461

    HI

    Lightning McQueen, star of the 2006 blockbuster film “Cars”, is a statutory r*pist. In the film, Lightning meets and falls in love with a car named Sally Carrera, a Porsche 911. This makes Sally only 4 years old during the film (which takes place in 2006). Lightning, on the other hand, is a stock car and while his age isn’t expressly given, we know that an average stock car can race for 20 to 30 years. Because Lightning is the best, we can assume that he is 30 years old at the end of “Cars 3”, which takes place in 2017, 11 years after “Cars”. This would make Lightning 19 years old when he met Sally. As the majority of the films take place in the United States, which has the age of consent set at 17 years old, every time Lightning sticks his engine shaft in Sally’s exhaust pipe, he is committing statutory r*pe.


















    Thanks for coming to my TED talk.

    Instagram: instagram.com/eits_joana/
    Twitter: twitter.com/tweet_joana
    Cameo: cameo.com/eits_joana


    If you want to translate the video: office-2016.info/user/timedtext_cs_panel?tab=2&c=UCkin59aR57-RgqvN04jHSIg

    Current sub count: 1, 808, 609

    With love,

    Jarly Rae Cepsen
  • Entertainment Entertainment

Comments • 20 132

  • Joana Ceddia
    Joana Ceddia   10 months back

    Hi there!
    A couple things I forgot to mention in the video:
    1. I am no longer as allergic to nuts as I say in the video. The allergy has been slowly “wearing off” if you will and I can eat coconut, pine nuts, macadamia nuts and almonds.
    2. In grade 2, I got my first pair of glasses. It’s been a ride ever since
    3. I also got braces in the second grade. Grade 2 was quite the year.

  • Emiliano Carrasco Muñoz
    Emiliano Carrasco Muñoz  15 hours back

    I share your pain with that Kumon shit, that place is horrible

    • Gjoko Veles
      Gjoko Veles  1 days back

      So your mom made you delete your instagram but a few year later she is OKAY WITH FILMING EVERYTHING AND UPLOADING IT ONLINE???

      • Rain Trester
        Rain Trester  1 days back

        I got an ikea ad before this...

        • Helen Luo
          Helen Luo  1 days back

          I got excited at the corruption image because there was a ten dollar bill with Hamilton on it

          • Angelo Gueldis
            Angelo Gueldis  2 days back

            what club do you swim for

            • Leah G.
              Leah G.  2 days back

              As someone who was born July 21 2001 (making her a month older than me), watching this video makes me realize how unaccomplished I am with my life. It is a weird comfort though thinking that as we were both in elementary school at the same time being the same age and only a couple hours away from each other (fellow Canadian here)

              • Hanna Amaral
                Hanna Amaral  2 days back

                Joana, a sua representação caricata e preconceituosa do Brasil, na sua visão de vivência norte-americana e infundada em vivência, só traz mais estigmas e preconceitos sobre nossa terra. Os gringos já nos julgam e demonizam suficientemente, não precisamos de mais apologia negativa e infundada vinda de uma menina desinformada de 17 anos. Pesquise, leia jornais, procure informações sobre os índices de pacificação em nosso país. Detesta-lo não te fará não ter nascido nele. Um abraço

                • Hanna Amaral
                  Hanna Amaral  2 days back

                  aliás, ao nomear alguns títulos de videos seus, em português, para atrair visualizadores brasileiros, você deveria prever que este tipo de representação não nos agradaria. Uma pena.

              • Nicki Miller
                Nicki Miller  3 days back

                You have 3.06 mil friends

                • a duck
                  a duck  3 days back

                  12:56 omfg i trained at that pool

                  • Lilly Hefren
                    Lilly Hefren  3 days back

                    When I saw Kumon... I was Terrified

                    • Trishalouisejuliene Cleofe

                      I go to kumon, It's hell

                      • Abbixlina
                        Abbixlina  4 days back

                        0:58
                        *_is that a chicken?_*

                        • Lily Moran
                          Lily Moran  4 days back

                          (^-^) IF JOANA LIKES MA COMMENT ILL GIVE YOU A HUG 🤗:)

                          • Gavin Connor
                            Gavin Connor  5 days back

                            Ur so relatable

                            • Ay!Ji
                              Ay!Ji  5 days back

                              You were born in Brazil?! I didn't knew :D

                              • Little Lionet
                                Little Lionet  5 days back

                                I’m related to Charles Manson 🤫

                                • It’s Isa
                                  It’s Isa  6 days back

                                  Lele Pons can confirm that you’re a *lAtInA*

                                  • Lizzie S
                                    Lizzie S  1 weeks back

                                    Oh god kumon I hated it too sis

                                    • Elizabeth Potato
                                      Elizabeth Potato  1 weeks back

                                      This is like a draw my life with stock images

                                      • may htun
                                        may htun  1 weeks back

                                        When she said her parents were her best friends at the end I nearly cried cuz holy shit that’s so sweet and wholesome💕

                                        • Christine Sanger
                                          Christine Sanger  1 weeks back

                                          We have the same Bday :000

                                          • Weirdo Cringe
                                            Weirdo Cringe  1 weeks back

                                            This was posted on my birthday, thanks for the present

                                            • Dorcas Shako
                                              Dorcas Shako  1 weeks back

                                              I thought this was pics of him

                                              • Jackie's weird world
                                                Jackie's weird world  1 weeks back

                                                Imagine one of John Cena's bullies finding this channel and realizing and she has over 3 million subscribers

                                                • Angelina Napolitano
                                                  Angelina Napolitano  1 weeks back

                                                  Joanas preschool life is more exciting than my middle school life

                                                  • Genevieve McCumbers
                                                    Genevieve McCumbers  1 weeks back

                                                    I'm in 5th grade I like my teachers too

                                                    • E
                                                      E  1 weeks back

                                                      host meme review

                                                      • Marajor The Mighty
                                                        Marajor The Mighty  1 weeks back

                                                        You were bullies in junior high they should have known better you ran and did swimming your probably stronger than you think

                                                        • Summer Smith
                                                          Summer Smith  1 weeks back

                                                          Joan I need you to drop ur editing app cuz I wanna be a YouTuber!

                                                          • RIRI
                                                            RIRI  1 weeks back

                                                            I still find it interesting that my kumon tecaher was called Joana.literally

                                                            • Keroガチャ
                                                              Keroガチャ  2 weeks back

                                                              Wow you have the same birthday as my dog







                                                              *also ima roach*

                                                              • YASISTAGIRL 1212
                                                                YASISTAGIRL 1212  2 weeks back

                                                                WHO YOU COULD SLEEP IN PRESCHOOL!!

                                                                • jborek 23
                                                                  jborek 23  2 weeks back

                                                                  what's a cleeck i only know a clique

                                                                  • Gakenia Mwige
                                                                    Gakenia Mwige  2 weeks back

                                                                    Why does your childhood look exactly like mine?? I mean, moving, ballet, swimming, kumon, IB, you're my twin from another dimention😂😂😂

                                                                    • Please Gogh
                                                                      Please Gogh  2 weeks back

                                                                      baby john cena looks like clara from hiho kids

                                                                      • Mr. Bow tie
                                                                        Mr. Bow tie  2 weeks back

                                                                        Wait... **Gasp**
                                                                        Plot twist: Joana is John Cena.

                                                                        • Ella Yancey
                                                                          Ella Yancey  2 weeks back

                                                                          The description......my childhood......

                                                                          • Kattz
                                                                            Kattz  2 weeks back

                                                                            I bet the people who used to bully johananoahaho feel stupid

                                                                            • Llama Li
                                                                              Llama Li  2 weeks back

                                                                              I am so so sorry for u...... I was enrolled to kumon and only after 6 years did my let me quit

                                                                              • Jpleepig
                                                                                Jpleepig  2 weeks back

                                                                                OMG SAME!!!! I DID KUMON TOO!!!!!

                                                                                • Cococaramel 444
                                                                                  Cococaramel 444  2 weeks back

                                                                                  OUR BIRTHDAYS R SO CLOSE!!

                                                                                  • Penny XD {gachalife}
                                                                                    Penny XD {gachalife}  2 weeks back

                                                                                    I remember at preschool I got a roast for lunch and NO I did not bring my own lunch I got lunch at school :P

                                                                                    • Lps Lemon
                                                                                      Lps Lemon  2 weeks back

                                                                                      5:19 I’m gonna say it...



                                                                                      I don’t care that you broke your elbow

                                                                                      • Mia Taagaard
                                                                                        Mia Taagaard  2 weeks back

                                                                                        We have the same birthday, i was just Born in 2005😂

                                                                                        • Rashmika Hyder
                                                                                          Rashmika Hyder  2 weeks back

                                                                                          I’m laughing right now

                                                                                          • Om Parghale
                                                                                            Om Parghale  2 weeks back

                                                                                            I'm the type of guy who hates people who just keep on talking, but I can listen to her all day with pleasure.

                                                                                            • Aysegul Ergonul
                                                                                              Aysegul Ergonul  2 weeks back

                                                                                              I want her to make a video searching up and watching “shriek is love, shriek is life”